And next on the catwalk is Sheba, sporting a sheer one-piece body stocking. Sheba has just returned from the veterinarian after her successful transition into womanhood (she was “fixed”), and promptly replaced the traditional post-operative Elizabethan collar with this far less inhibiting - and far more stylish - protective wear.

Sheba van Clowder

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Last week when we reviewed the corpse count of America’s Civil War, we noted the recent American death toll in Iraq and Afghanistan as “a comparatively minuscule 5,000-and-counting.” We find even a single death in an immoral war appalling (are there any moral wars?), and we certainly do not mean to trivialize the recent death toll. But aren’t the US Government and the US Press trivializing it by refusing to publish anything more than a list of names?

In the Civil War, we lost over 623,000 Americans in just four years. In Iraq-Afghanistan, we’ve lost 5,000 in nine years. I guess that’s an improvement of sorts. Still, enough is enough, and too much is too much.

Are you old enough to remember that in the 1960s we would see actual injured and dead American soldiers and their foes and collaterally damaged civilians every night on TV? It was enough to rile this nation and put a stop to the insanity.

Where are our photo-journalists today? Taking pictures of Sandra Bullock’s gown at the Oscars? Where are our investigative reporters? Interviewing Balloon Boy and Octomom? Where are our uncensored news sources? When did Barbara Bush’s grotesquely insensitive statement - “Why should we hear about body bags and deaths? It’s not relevant. So why should I waste my beautiful mind on something like that?” - become the credo for the American Press?

Americans deserve to see and hear the complete truth. In fact, since we’re sponsoring the carnage we are obliged to see and hear the complete truth. Then if America’s voting population deems these wars acceptable, at least we’ll have based it on all the facts.

Hodgepodge Grumblebeak

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It’s Saint Patrick’s Day! Heading to the bars tonight? Here’s a trick that’ll blow anybody’s mind. Even if they’re sober. Even if they’re not Irish.

You can let them examine the empty bottle before the trick. Then you make a coin pass right through the glass and into the bottle. Then they can examine the bottle again. It seems impossible, but like all effective scams, there’s a trick to it.

Download the tutorial today and have it well-practiced by tonight.

Coin Through Bottle Trick

Scrud Kelley

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Dear Vin Scelsa,

Me and Razoo Kelley believes that music comes from the soul, so there’s no point in actually to hear it to preciate it.

Mute-sicians Forever,

me and Razoo Kelley

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This week we have multiple corpses. We can’t show all of the 623,026 American Civil War dead, but some intrepid photographers like Mathew Brady and his proteges took a couple of thousand snaps for posterity. Some in 3-D, no less…

Borrow somebody’s ring, get a rubber band and have somebody inspect it and even cut it for you. Then make the ring slowly move upward along the rubber band. It seems to defy the laws of physics, but it’s actually physics that makes it work…

The Vancouver Clowder grew a bit this week as Malika, a seven month old SBT (purebred) Savannah joined the family. After a few hours of some shyness and required hissing and moaning, the seven girls settled down and cozied up. Bengal Sheba is Malika’s best friend, being that she’s the only one who has as much energy!