Let’s say the next one is a bit bigger and easier to see. Sure it could end civilization as we know it, but it might give us a couple of weeks to run in circles waving our hands in the air as we blame the government, see some cool graphics on CNN, and implore all the gods of the world to give us one more chance. But chill; mammals survived the last big one – the one that killed off all the dinosaurs – so we’d have a shot to survive this one, too.

So here’s how it could go: Asteroid impacts Earth. Tsunamis, firestorms, earthquakes, and prolonged nuclear winter aside, the asteroid impact could destroy power lines, telecommunication satellites, and may electromagnetically wipe out all of our hard drives, plunging Earth into a long period of electronic rehabilitation. Long before the dust settles, survivors will have to learn manual simulations of current pastimes. Computers, email, and video games will be replaced by typewriters, pencil-to-paper letters, and toys of wood and metal.

Sure, billions of people would be dead, but let’s look at the brighter side of Armageddon: we’d be getting back to the basics. Interpersonal communication skills will improve, we’ll get more physical activity as we get back to farming and rebuilding homes, and our attention spans will elongate past the current instant gratification threshold.

So it may behoove us to keep these disciplines in our current personal arsenal. To that end, I’d like to recommend that you find some good old-fashioned batteries-not-required pastimes… and order them while there’s still an Internet! Consider the following, for starters:

• Classic board games. Mentally stimulating, keeping alive competitive drive, mathematical skills, and even the political skills needed to resurrect a civilization.
• Classic bingo, around which communities can meet while gambling addictions are safely satisfied.
• The Brio Labyrinth, to simulate 2-handed video game action and maintain all-important eye-hand coordination.
• A wooden pogo stick to exercise the body while providing a necessary means of transportation, since all the car batteries will be as dead as all the horses.
• Doorway Puppet Theater, since there won’t be any TV or movies.
• Mouse Trap, a must-have for any aspiring civil engineer. Entire towns may be rebuilt using the basic principles observed in this game.